Hello again, dear friend Anonymous. Welcome back to our sex talk column where readers submit questions, and then we have an expert answer them.
The topic of our latest submission: Do couples in long-term relationships actually have good sex, or is it just a lie?
We tapped Certified Sex Educator Casey Murphy to help answer. We’ll let her take it away:
Truth be told, both are likely accurate. Many people don’t like to admit that their sex life may be suffering. Others are able to maintain a hot sex life despite the highs, lows, ebbs, and flows of a long-term relationship. The answer is different for everyone.
How do you define “good sex”? Is it quantity? Quality? Uber kinky? Consistency? What is fulfilling for both of you?
Either way, long-term relationship sex can be some of the most satisfying, gratifying sex ever. Many people might think that being “too comfortable” in a relationship is a bad thing, but when it comes to sex and physical intimacy, being ultra-comfortable can be a relationship superpower.
Whether you’re having it once a day or once a month, long-term relationship sex can feel more fulfilling than early-stage relationship sex, aging like a fine wine, as they say. Over time, long-term relationships allow us to release inhibitions and insecurities, improve partner communication, and foster a safe foundation to explore together.
The biggest difference between a dead bedroom and a passionate playground usually comes down to effort. Just like self-care or nurturing a plant, maintaining a healthy sex life requires intention and attention. (Not sure who needs to hear this right now, but it is okay to schedule sex.)
If good sex is high on your list of #RelationshipGoals, you betta work!
You ask, we answer. Send your relationship questions to [email protected], and one of our experts may just answer them in an upcoming column.
