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Sexual Wellness

SPICE UP YOUR SEX LIFE with A Yes/No/Maybe List

By Poosh
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 Photo credit @perazna
@perazna

Bust those erotic encyclopedias out, because it’s time to make a Yes/No/Maybe (YNM) sex list. Trust us—it’s a fun and rewarding activity. 

Want your partner to spank you but don’t know how to bring it up? YNM list. Curious about anal but feeling too intimidated to initiate a convo? YNM list. Wanna be called a filthy cum slut, but can’t quite get the words out? Yep, you guessed it—YNM list. 

Doing this with a partner (or even by yourself) can spice up your sex life and help you feel more empowered. Below, we break it down. 

What is a Yes/No/Maybe list? 

Pretty much exactly what it sounds like, tbh. It’s a list of sexual acts that you categorize as either Yes, No, or Maybe. Yes = down to do it. No = not down to do it. Maybe = some reservations or concerns, but you’re curious and may consider it. 

It’s relatively straightforward to do it at home with your computer or a piece of paper and a pen. Create three columns—one for Yes, one for No, and one for Maybe—and then fill out each one. For those of us who aren’t DIYers, templates like this one cum (ha) in handy. 

What’s the point of a Yes/No/Maybe list? 

Talking about sex openly (!) out loud (!!) with another person (!!!) can be intimidating. This list helps make it less so. When done with a partner, it helps open up the lines of communication, allowing you both to be more open and honest about what you like and don’t like, as well as what you’re curious about. It can help you set boundaries and discover new things. Fill the lists out separately, and when everyone is done, come (cum?) together and go through them with each other. 

You can also do a Yes/No/Maybe list solo, which can help you get in touch with your sexual desires and figure out what it is that you like. 

What should I put on my Yes/No/Maybe list? 

Whatever you want! And it doesn’t have to be solely sex acts—a YNM list can also be used to explore how you want sex to make you feel. 

The templates linked above already include sex acts and are ready for you to fill out. If you’re DIYing it and looking for some inspo, here’s a list to get you going:

– Mutual masturbation
– Spanking 
– Hair pulling
– Firm hand on the neck 
– Nipple play
– Biting 
– Anal sex
– Anal toys 
– Threesomes
– Deepthroating 
– Cuddling 
– Dirty talk

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