Hello again, dear friend Anonymous. Welcome back to our sex talk column. Today’s question comes from the Poosh editorial slack channel: What do couples ask in a sex therapy session?
We previously covered what sex therapy actually is (a form of talk therapy that focuses on sexual concerns and empowers people to deepen their sexual connection either with themselves and/or their partner) and what it isn’t (getting it on in front of the therapist—embarrassing, not commonly needed).
But we were curious to know more.
So we tapped Shamyra Howard, a sexologist, licensed clinical social worker, and sex and relationship expert/therapist to share the top questions that couples ask her.
She goes into detail below.
1. How can we improve our communication?
“One of the main issues couples report is communication problems. Contact is usually initiated by the partner who feels most affected by the perceived communication issues. Therapy usually consists of the couple learning emotional intelligence and each other’s communication styles.”
2. Why don’t I want sex as much as my partner?
“This question usually comes up due to one partner feeling guilty for rejecting. The rejected partner often feels inadequate due to the rejection. However, in therapy, couples are relieved to learn that their mismatched libido isn’t either of their faults and discover ways to engage in mutually pleasurable sexual experiences.”
3. Why don’t I orgasm with him?
“Over 80% of women in heterosexual relationships don’t orgasm with their partner during penis-in-vagina sex. This phenomenon is referred to as the orgasm/pleasure gap. In therapy with me, On The Green Couch, couples learn what the orgasm gap is and how to close it in their relationship.”
Up next, be the first to know our weekly content and sign up for our Poosh newsletter.
