While many dream of a love-at-first-sight fairy tale, the truth is, too much love too quickly can often be a red flag. Not sure if it’s real love or if something unhealthy is going on? Ahead I’m sharing four signs (as a Love Coach) that you’re being love bombed. Read through and see if any boxes check off, but don’t feel ashamed or alone—this is a common dating habit (now it just has a name tied to it).
Sign #1: Exaggerated declarations of love from day one.
A classic sign that you’re being love bombed is that your love interest seems obsessed with you from the first date, so much so that you begin to wonder if it’s even possible for them to like you this much when they don’t really know you yet. It’s common for a love bomber to call you their soulmate or make promises about spending forever together within the first few days or weeks of meeting you. If you’ve just started dating someone, and they tell you that you’re the best and no one else compares to you, be cautious. While these words are flattering, they can often be a trick to reel you in by preying on your need to be validated. Once you’re hooked on their praise, a love bomber will suddenly stop their effusive compliments and replace them with either silence or criticism, leaving you confused and wondering if what they said was real. Should your partner love and adore you? Yes, of course. But if they yank their praise and attention away as quickly as they gave it, that’s a red flag.
Sign #2: They carbon copy you.
It’s amazing to meet someone that you vibe with right off the bat, but, if your new love interest agrees with every single thing you say and do, watch out. A love bomber will often change all of their likes and dislikes to mold to your preferences. Do many couples naturally start liking the same things over time and even dressing alike? For sure, but the key words are over time. If you meet someone and they appear to be your clone right off the bat, chances are they’re acting the part.
Sign #3: They overload you to get you hooked.
Over-the-top displays of affection early into the relationship with no regard to your personal boundaries are a key warning sign that you’re being love bombed. A love bomber will send 20 texts in a row, call you pet names from the beginning without your consent, or send gifts that are way more lavish than the time you’ve known each other warrants. If you feel like your love interest is going overboard with gifts or communication to make you feel addicted to them, beholden, or guilty, take note. Love bombers never give freely; there’s always a hook.
Sign #4: Your gut feels that something is off.
Above all else, trust your intuition, and if something doesn’t feel right, speak up. A healthy person can honor your boundaries and go at your preferred pace. If someone ignores your boundaries and keeps pushing affection onto you, they are likely love bombing you.
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