May was Masturbation Month. We may have missed the boat on acknowledging it, but we celebrated, we observed. And whether you’re fresh from a breakup or you’ve been single for a while, it’s time we all go and f*ck ourselves.
Hear me out, I know that sounds aggro, but my goal as the Pleasure Princess is to make sure that regardless of relationship status, everyone is having mind-blowing sex. And that starts with you.
There is nothing wrong with going out and having a little (or a lot) of consensual fun with whomever you please. But too often, I see people waste valuable energy trying to fulfill their sexual needs with a partner instead of focusing on themselves. Great sex starts with understanding what brings you pleasure, and sometimes that takes a little personal practice, personal play, and solo sex.
What better time to get busy with yourself than when you aren’t busy with others?
F**k People Pleasing
Prioritizing your pleasure is a vital component of self-care, and it is about time we understand that great sex is not a luxury, it is an essential.
Porn and cultural representations have taught us to think more about how sex looks instead of how it feels. Sex is then largely performative, and we become spectators to our own sexual encounters.
How many of us have faked an orgasm because we wanted to please our partner? And if you’re faking it, are you really getting what you need?
This is where solo sex can work wonders. Masturbation is a deeply personal approach to understanding the scope of your body’s pleasure potential. You don’t have to think about the questions that create anxiety or be distracted by how others perceive you. How do I look in this light? Am I doing this position correctly? Are these sounds or noises sexy, or am I dulling the mood? Are they even liking this…?
F**k Yourself
In personal play, you focus on yourself. What touch, sensation, sounds, and positions bring you pleasure? In a zero-judgment space, you can explore different erogenous zones on the body, igniting pleasure pathways you didn’t know existed. And every day can be different. Maybe one day you enjoy temperature play, the next day a vibrator, the other an arousal serum like Play Primer that can intensify stimulation.
But it is not only about the physical.
The brain is our largest sex organ, and often, we have to arouse our minds for our bodies to respond similarly to the feelings we get when we know our partner desires us. Think of ways to create that dynamic with yourself. It can start by taking yourself out on a date, admiring your body in a mirror, affirming your own beauty, watching porn, or even building fantasies.
Do for you what you wish a partner could, but do it 10 times better!
Pleasure as power
You become powerful when you engage in solo sex. You are telling the world, but more importantly yourself, that you matter and there is space for you, your body, and your mind.
Pleasure often found and felt is transformational, uncovering self-awareness and confidence that carries over into other parts of your life. Don’t hide the pleasure you take in yourself. You deserve great sex, especially when you are single, and it’s time to stand up for our pleasure. So go ahead, and f**k yourself!