How do you manage traumatic events that have happened or are happening in your life? How do you remove emotions from your brain related to certain challenging situations, either from your past or your present? How do you change your connection to these emotional setbacks, forever?
Let’s go back to the beginning of humankind and how we have learned to exist through certain survival methods. Depending on the life situation, it can either take your body into a state of “danger” or a state of “safe.” Let’s go even deeper. The autonomic nervous system is controlled by the vagus nerve, which begins in the brain and goes all the way down and throughout the endocrine system, bonding all of your organs together. Your autonomic nervous system functions aren’t consciously controlled, such as heart rate, breathing, and digestion. It is divided into two halves: the parasympathetic, or “safe” and calm resting state, and sympathetic, the “fight or flight” danger mode.
When you find yourself in a stressful situation, the vagus nerve sends electrical currents down your spine, stimulating a response of fight or flight, where you resist forcibly or run away. In today’s world, you would be stunned at how much time you and even your children spend in the fight-or-flight mode. But it’s possible to manage your central nervous system so that you can disconnect your emotional attachments to certain stressful or traumatic situations. You can control your emotional-brain-body connection.
Havening is a psycho-sensory therapy technique (a mind-body connection) that’s easy to use every day of the week. In just a few minutes, it can change your brainwave state so that you can actually disconnect the emotions that are stuck in your brain related to certain traumatic and stressful events.
Here’s how it works. First, identify the stressful event. Then, identify your emotions attached to that event (you can even write this down). Then, create an affirmation that will help disconnect your emotions from the challenging situation, such as, “I am calm, I am at peace, I am safe,” “I am open to being compassionate,” “I am hopeful,” “I open my heart to friendship,” or “I open my mind to learning.” Then find a quiet, out-of-the-way space, sitting or standing, and close your eyes. Next, bend your arms at the elbows and cross them in front of you. Resting the palm of each hand on the opposing shoulder, gently stroke your arm, starting at your shoulder down to your elbow. When you have reached your elbow, raise your hands back to your shoulders and repeat this stroking motion, all the while repeating to yourself or out loud your affirmation or mantra. Do this for five to seven minutes.
Once you have completed your session of this relaxation therapy method, open your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and then make your evaluation. Ask yourself, “Do I still have emotions attached to this stressful event? Have I moved away from the unlikely event toward the life outcome that I want?” To no surprise, you will discover that not only have you immediately had a positive change in your physiological (body) state, but that you no longer have certain negative emotions attached to the situation—they will have all but gone away.
This sensory relaxation technique relieves a tremendous amount of life stressors, such as learning disabilities, depression associated from traumatic events, autism, insomnia, high blood pressure, and auditory hypersensitivity.
Always remember your values, strengths, and skills. In doing this technique, you will remember the kind of person that you want to be and how you choose to respond to current challenges or stressful traumatic memories.