Hello again, dear friend Anonymous, and welcome back to our sex talk column.
Today, we’re discussing the elusive vaginal orgasm (aka internal orgasm). There are actually a few different types of vaginal orgasms—it’s not all about the G-spot!
To help demystify this topic, we tapped Emily Morse, doctor of human sexuality and founder of Sex With Emily.
One of the biggest misconceptions about vaginal Os: “If I can’t have an orgasm now, my body must not be ‘built’ that way. Great news—most vulva owners CAN learn to have more internal orgasms, or at least more pleasure,” Emily says.
“But they take practice, so don’t get discouraged if you can’t achieve one right away. It takes time for your brain to register these sensations as exciting and positive and for your body to relax into the stimulation.”
Ready to learn more? We’ll let her take it away.
“First, let me just say, there is no ‘right way to orgasm,’ and the study of female orgasm is understudied. That said, internal orgasms include the G-spot (or ‘G-area,’ as I like to call it because it’s more of an area than a single spot).
“But not all internal vaginal orgasms are G-spot orgasms. There are several erogenous zones inside the vagina that can lead to pleasure and even orgasm.
“Let’s review G-spot orgasms first.
“The G-spot (or G-area), is located about two inches inside of the vagina, perched on the front vaginal wall. Although its exact size and location may vary from vagina to vagina, you can find it by feeling its ridged texture. When a vulva owner becomes aroused, this tissue swells and becomes more sensitive to the touch.
“These orgasms are probably the most well-known type of internal vaginal orgasm, but there are other internal ‘spots’ that can be stimulated to orgasm.
“Here are two more:
1. A-spot: The A refers to ‘anterior fornix,’ and like the G-area, it’s another deep, pleasurable region that can be stimulated for internal orgasm. It’s located about two inches higher than the G-area.
2. Cervix: Yes, your cervix can help produce a deep, internal orgasm. Some vulva owners describe this as more of a full-body orgasm, with sensations beginning in the cervix and spreading out through the entire abdomen. It’s located high inside the vaginal canal, perched at the top.
“These ‘spots’ describe various portions of the vaginal canal with nerve endings that can be stimulated to prompt orgasm. It’s a totally common thing for people to be confused about!”
Tips to Have a Vaginal O
The first tip is this: Try it during solo sex (masturbation) after you’ve already had a clitoral orgasm.
“Once you have a clitoral orgasm, the surrounding tissues swell, and the vaginal walls become more sensitive and primed for more orgasms. It’s important to take time on your own, so you’re less inhibited and not feeling any pressure from a partner wondering if you’re there yet. And you don’t have to worry about your orgasm face, not that you ever should!”
Second, practice with a toy.
“Vulva owners are more likely to find their internal pleasure spots with a toy rather than a penis. There are so many vibrators specifically made for internal stimulation. You want to be completely relaxed when you insert it, and take it slow. Practice taking deep breaths into your pelvic floor and doing a squeeze or a Kegel exercise at the end of the breath before you exhale.
“You’re waking up the nerve endings inside your vagina, which takes time—so be patient. The more you try this over a span of weeks or even months, the more your brain will connect the dots between stimulation and pleasure.”
Third, strengthen your pelvic floor muscles.
“These muscles are partially responsible for orgasm, so the stronger they are, the better. When your pelvic floor is strong and toned, you’ll have more muscle fibers available to stimulate your genital nerve endings before and during orgasm. You can work out your pelvic floor with kegel exercises. Pro tip: I recommend Je Joue, Ami.”
The last tip is this: Use lube!
“You’re 80% more likely to orgasm when lube is present. I always say, ‘The wetter, the better.’ Reach for lube, no matter what type of sex you’re having. Thank me later.”
