Although society has made progress in destigmatizing mental health, as a therapist, I see a need to improve in identifying signs of mental health struggles and feeling empowered to seek mental health support when necessary.
I’m a licensed psychotherapist and founder of a modern therapy practice in California that helps high-achieving women overcome anxiety, perfectionism, and relationship challenges. After working with many successful women, I understand that those who struggle the most may not show it outwardly.
Below, I share four common barriers to therapy that I’ve noticed in high-performing women.
High-achieving women often associate asking for help with failure or weakness. Fear of judgment leads to resistance to entering therapy, even when it is necessary.
The advice:
Work through any fears that receiving support will take away from your self-image of being strong, competent, or self-sufficient. Asking for help shows intelligence and courage, both of which are strengths and assets to have as a person. Therapy can help you achieve your goals in life with less stress.
Barrier 2: Time constraints + Costs
High-achievers tend to feel like they’re always on the go, juggling various roles and responsibilities in their day. When it comes to prioritizing, they will often choose professional goals over taking time for themselves. It’s true that therapy is an investment of both time and money. And you may believe committing to therapy is just one more thing on your to-do list, but the benefits extend far beyond the immediate moment.
The advice:
Think of therapy as the one time slot in your week that isn’t for doing or achieving. It’s time to slow down and focus on what you need to feel and perform your best in the long run.
Prioritizing one hour a week for therapy can help you develop new stress-reducing skills and learn to be more efficient with your time. As for the cost investment, make the most of your insurance coverage by seeking out a therapist within your plan’s network. Additionally, if you have any out-of-network mental health benefits, your therapist can provide receipts to submit for reimbursement from your insurance.
Barrier 3: Cultural or Familial Beliefs
In some cultures or families, there may be strong taboos against discussing mental health issues or seeking professional help. Individuals may feel pressured to conform to these beliefs for fear of how the family may react. A lack of support from family or friends who have a negative view of therapy is one of the top factors that discourage individuals from seeking help.
The advice:
As a therapist, I want you to know that you have rights to confidentiality. No one has the right to know about your treatment unless you tell them. It can be hard to do such a vulnerable thing alone, but just know that therapists are there to meet you where you are. Any good therapist will create a safe space by demystifying the process of therapy and helping you process any biases you may have due to family or cultural influences.
Barrier 4: Fear of Being Vulnerable
It can be difficult to imagine yourself feeling comfortable enough to open up about private information to a stranger. Many high-achieving individuals have been independent and self-sufficient from a young age, so they may doubt a stranger’s ability/skills to understand and help them.
The advice:
You have likely been self-reliant for many years. However, just because you’ve been self-sufficient until now, that doesn’t mean you have to continue to be. The fit between therapist and client is the main indicator of successful therapy outcomes. It may take a few sessions or a few therapists to get the right match, but it’s worth it!
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Erica Basso is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (114828) practicing statewide in California. She helps high-achieving women overcome anxiety, perfectionism, relationship challenges, and more. To learn more about working with her, visit www.ericabassotherapy.com.
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