Kourt: What I wanted to talk to you guys about.
Julia: Oh ok, this is serious..
Kourt: This is super serious…
Julia: I feel like this is an announcer..
Kourt: No, but I feel like lately we’ve been having a lot of conversations like in our family about, how do you teach your kids about, you know, religion, and like what we believe in and just..
Chad: Right.
Kourt: without like, you don’t wanna force\
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: your own beliefs, I think, onto them but it’s like
Chad: Right.
Kourt: How do you just, because we grew up, you know always hearing bible stories. My dad always read us bible stories, and we would talk about it, in the car we would listen to bible songs.
Chad: Right.
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: You know, we would go to, you know, we went to bible…um, or Sunday school.
Julia: /Sunday school.
Kourt: Um, not every Sunday, but a lot. And so, I just wonder is there something that you guys do, or that’s really important to you, like which like routines or,
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: You know things that you do with your own family that you think would be helpful.
Chad: Right.
Julia: Yeah, um.
Chad: Yeah I think, you know, all of—all of that stuff, like you could remember it, right?
Kourt: Yeah!
Chad: Like it–it stays in you. You know, I—same for us. Like both of us— we grew up, you know with christian parents, and I mean our parents did the same thing. So, I think with our kids, I’m just trying to, you know like, even on the drive to school
Kourt: Mhm.
Chad: I’m you know, every morning, as I’m getting ready to drop off my son, I’m like,”alright, I’m gonna pray, over you. And remember you’re a leader, at your school, and–and people follow you. And i’m gonna pray that, you know, you’re a light on your campus,” like, I just—using those kind of words
Kourt: That’s nice.
Chad: To let him know, like Oh! You know, you can be confident today. So, I think it’s just, try and take just like regular moments
Kourt: That’s so good.
Chad: And, just go like, “Hey, we’re gonna go to bed, but before we go to bed, hey son, is there any–any friend you wanna pray for?”
Kourt: That’s really good.
Chad: Like I’ll ask him that a lot. Like, “Hey, is there anybody at your school that’s going through a hard time? We should pray for them.” and then he’s like, usually, “No.” and I’m like, “Well, let’s think about it. Maybe a family member you’d like to pray for.” So I think, just trying to take normal moments of life, like you were saying, like your dad, you’re in the car and you’re listening to bible stories
Kourt: Mhm.
Chad: I think it’s gotta be\
Kourt: We used to watch these movies, I remember cartoons\
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: That were bible stories.
Chad: Right! Like super book—
Kourt: Bible stories, so I know every bible story
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: You know, you just remember them from growing up but I—and we have a positive playlist that we listen to in the mornings
Julia: I love that.
Chad: That’s great.
Kourt: and it has, just positive songs
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: It has like, you know, don’t worry be happy
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: and it has, you know, songs that aren’t church songs, but then it has some church songs. Two of the church songs are ones you’ve sent me, and I added those to our morning playlist instead of listening to
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: You know, music that
Chad: Whatever.
Kourt: It’s just those lyrics get in your head
Chad: They do.
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: and it’s not the best way to start your day.
Chad: Yeah totally….. Yeah and I think, you know, it’s like, that stuff’s gonna stay. It’s gonna stick in them, and so, just I don’t know. We’re doing—I’m doing the same things my parents did with me. That’s like all that I know to do. And look how great you turned out, cause your dad was invested in you, and making it, just like, “Hey, we’re gonna go to church, we’re gonna talk about God, he’s good, look what he can do in our lives,” and… it becomes normal, rather than like this big event.
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: But I do find, that with praying at night, I get stuck saying the same prayer, every night…
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: Pretty much. You know?
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: and so I do think that’s nice, asking them, you know
Chad: Totally.
Kourt: “Is there somebody you wanna pray for? Is there, um, oh I could see Reign like going on about it, forever.
Chad: Right.
Kourt: When I was like, “Is there someone you wanna pray for?” you know.
Chad: Like I was just listening to Scott talk about raising kids, and he said the most important moment, like as a parent is when, cause it’s so few— few and far between, right? When your kid starts opening up
Kourt: Mhm.
Chad: And showing you into like their soul, and like what’s going on in their life\
Kourt: Mhm.
Chad: Like Mason’s, probably gonna do that like what, once every two months\
Kourt: Is there where this goes?
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: Exactly.
Chad: So— so i’m just trying to like, take all these little moments, so that like actually, maybe he does feel like he can talk to me and he does trust me, and we can go serious. But, every once in awhile, he’s like, you know starts opening up about what happened at school
Kourt: Mhm.
Chad: Some kid said this, it’s like, so I think that– that habit makes—makes him think, my five year old the most, but makes him think, this is an opportunity I can talk.
Julia: Yeah.
Chad: To say something serious
Kourt: and Reign tells me, stories all the time, and I just could take that opportunity to turn it into, like, he was telling me, you know, this one kid he always says, “Do you like my outfit?” and then the kid always says, “No.” and then Reign was like, “It breaks my heart mom, into a million pieces
Julia: Wow.
Chad: Stop.
Kourt: and so, I could take that opportunity and say, “Should we pray for them?”
Chad: Right.
Kourt: like your style…
Chad: That their eyes would be opened.
Kourt: Yes, that their eyes would be opened.
Chad: That their heart would be turned towards good fashion.
Kourt: Um..
Julia: Well, I especially think with the boys, like we have boys, and sometimes they’re just not in the mood to talk or share how they feel.
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: And it’s like, it’s the opportune time for you, it’s not necessarily the opportune time for them.
Chad: Right.
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: So it’s like, when you see that little window
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: you wanna just kind of like, jump through it.
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: like to savor the moment.
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: But, a lot of like they’re ready to talk, and it’s not opportune for us. So, I think for us
Chad: Yeah.
Julia: like we’re learning how to do that dance, with timing. And I love so much how you were saying like, “I don’t wanna like force it down their throat.”
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: I think, like with a lot of things, like culture and
Chad: Yeah.
Julia: or faith, it’s—it’s more caught than it is taught, you know, so yeah we\
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: we wanna teach things, but a lot of times the kids are just
Kourt: they know it from learning it?
Chad: They’re around it.
Julia: This is what—what they do.. This is who you are, you know.
Kourt: Yeah, mhm.
Julia: So it’s like, this is who we are, like as a Veach family, like I do this silly little song\
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: I’m like, “We’re the Veach boys and we share our toys,” and it’s just like, reiterating like
Chad: Yeah.
Julia: We make lots of noise, like stupid things but
Kourt: Mhm.
Julia: Just reiterating like who we are, not necessarily what we do. Cause I think some times, like for young kids, it’s like, you need to do this, this, and this. You’re like frantic.
Kourt: Yeah.
Julia: I feel that way sometimes.
Kourt: Yeah.
Julia: But, but I don’t know like, you know, we go to church, like, I–I round up the kids and we do it as a family,
Chad: Yeah.
Julia: and it’s like, oh this is what we do.
Chad: and if you invest in your kids so much, they’re gonna turn out great because you’re always available, and interested in their world, and just the fact that you wanna teach them faith, they’ll learn faith. But, I just read this quote, this past week, and it said, “It’s hard to heal broken men, but it’s easier to raise courageous kids.” Like it’s so hard to heal
Kourt: Yes.
Chad: grown, broken men.
Kourt: Yes.
Chad: But it’s so much easier to raise courageous kids.
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: That’s such a good one.
Chad: It’s like, so, on their way to school, cause you have the same routine
Julia: Yeah.
Chad: I get to this one part, and every morning, I say to Winston, I go, “Hey, I wanna tell you three things I love about you today.”
Kourt: Awww.
Chad: He just kinda, and I go, “So, you’re the most handsome kid I’ve ever met. Number two\
Kourt: Do you always say the same things?
Chad: No! Three different things everyday!
Kourt: Ok, ok.
Chad: Well, uhhh, one day I’ll go, “Nobody eats ice cream better than you!” like he just laughs
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: Yeah.
Chad: But it’s like he’s, so that I say, I—I affirm him, and then pray over him, then he’s gone.
Kourt: Yeah.
Chad: So I want him walking into school, going like, “I’m the man!”
Kourt: Yeah.
Chad: “My dad told me that I’m the man.”
Kourt: Yeah.
Chad: Like I want our kids to be confident\
Kourt: Yeah.
Chad: Think about you guys, like you–you’re so confident. Like you are so confident.
Kourt: Mhm.
Chad: Because you had a great dad.
Kourt: Mhm!
Chad: Like, you’re a confident person because you are firm and loved by your dad.
Kourt: Yeah.
Julia: Mhm.
Chad: and if you have great parents that love you, and teach you faith, like you’re set up for success.
Kourt: Mhm. And I feel like so many people don’t know unconditional love,
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: and so, they think that they have to lie, or the have to pretend they’re someone else.
Julia: Yeah.
Kourt: Or they have to prove themselves,
Chad: Yeah.
Kourt: because, they weren’t shown that.
Chad: Do you ever get parent guilt?
Kourt: Yeah.
Chad: Oh my gosh.
Kourt: Like, for what?
Chad: It’s just like–
Kourt: All the— I get it all the time
Chad: If you ever fail as a parent
Julia: All the time.
Kourt: Oh yeah.
Chad: I feel—it’s the worst feeling in the whole world.
Julia: Yeah\
Kourt: Yeah\
Chad: When I’m like, “Why did I do that?”
Julia: Yeah.
Chad: Or, “Why did I say that?” or I overreacted
Kourt: Yeah. Totally.
Chad: Or, I’m just like, I don’t want to be that parent. Kourt one of my—one of my favorite scriptures about kids though
Kourt: Hmm?
Chad: is in Proverbs, when it says, “Raise up a child or train up a child the way that they should go, and when they’re older they won’t depart from it.”
Kourt: Hmmm.
Chad: So it’s like if you–if you train them up, raise them up, think about it. You’re still walking out the truths that your dad taught you
Kourt: Mhm.
