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Adulting

How to Thrive, Not Just Survive

By Erica Spiegelman
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 Photo credit @heir
@heir

Many people today are, unfortunately, just surviving instead of thriving. It is understandable, given the events of the last couple years! Some people seem to have a “I need to just get by” type of mentality every day. 

We must remember that we are capable and worthy of thriving and optimizing our lives!

The last thing we want is to have regrets that we didn’t truly live, achieve our goals and dreams, thrive, express, and create the lives we want, because we were in survival mode. 

Living in survival mode prohibits us from living a life of meaning and fulfillment.

If you feel you have been surviving and just going through the motions, let today be the turning point in your life where you turn it all around. 

Here are some tools to help you start THRIVING today!

TIME MANAGEMENT

Some of us have too many commitments, overbooked schedules, and not enough personal time for SELF-CARE. Learning to manage your time will be a life saver. 

Get an actual organizer or calendar and write down how you will structure your day. I recommend to my clients to write down everything you plan to do every day. For example, self-care time, exercise, work, personal time, social time, relaxing time, sleep, and so forth. When you see your schedule written out, you can then prioritize and make sure your day is balanced. 

LIVE IN THE PRESENT

If you’re ruminating on what’s already happened or worried about what is to come, you may be exacerbating your anxiety and unhappiness by choosing to dwell on things you can’t change or control. 

To practice being in the present, forgive yourself and others for any past wrongs. Also, identify exactly what you are worried about in the future.Then, plan for how you would deal with different scenarios or just learn ways to let go. There is only so much we can control. 

Once you have begun to take control of your past- and future-oriented thoughts, you can truly begin to appreciate the present moment.

IDENTIFY YOUR STRESSORS

Start by identifying the two or three things that cause you the most stress on a consistent basis. Then, determine if there are concrete things you can do to lessen or even eliminate the pressure. If you can’t eliminate or change a stressor—like a job you dislike but can’t afford to quit—challenge yourself to handle it differently or learn new ways to react or communicate better to see if that would help. 

CREATE A SELF-CARE ROUTINE

Self-care must be a NON-NEGOTIABLE so that we can thrive! Creating small goals and routines can help us with our self-care as well. We are typically prouder of ourselves, have better boundaries, feel better, get more restful sleep, eat healthier, and have more confidence. When you are taking care of yourself mentally, physically, and emotionally, you are more likely to thrive and feel better. 

A great way to start this process is to write down 1 to 3 self-care goals daily. 

Here are some examples: 

–Journal 5 minutes a day 
-Walk at least 20 minutes 
-Get 7 to 8 hours of sleep 
-Reach out to a friend or family member with a call or text 
-Make my bed 

(Get as specific as possible).

We all have the power to change the direction of our lives at any point in time. So have faith, and give yourself the gift of thriving and living your best life!

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Erica Spiegelman is a wellness specialist, recovery counselor, and author of the new book The Rewired Life (2018) as well as Rewired: A Bold New Approach to Addiction & Recovery(2015), the Rewired Workbook (2017), the Rewired Coloring Book (2017), all published by Hatherleigh Press. Erica holds a bachelor’s degree in literature from the University of Arizona and is a California State Certified Drug and Alcohol Counselor (CADAC)-II from UCLA. For more information, visit Erica’s website or follow @Erica Spiegelman on Instagram.

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