Ah, yes. Complaining always helps solve our problems … said no one ever. There are times in life (cough, hello holidays) when our ‘whelm levels are higher than normal, and that’s OK. However, voicing our grievances on a repetitive loop, not seeking solutions but mere commiseration, rarely breeds positivity, if ever.
Happiness coach and founder of @HopeNuggets, Wendell Miracle, explains that “complaints lead to more complaints. Ditch the complaints and watch more magic flow into your life.” Miracle shares this little gem and his top three ways to replace complaints in his new, best-selling book, Have a Magical Day: 7 Keys to Living Happy Every Day.
Complaining isn’t pleasant for those around us, or productive for us personally. Miracle tells us that thinking about a complaint, even without actually voicing it, does something negative to our overall disposition. “Complaining always lowers your vibration. When your vibration lowers, your levels of happiness lower as well. Complaining shifts your focus from gratitude to a lack of gratitude, which causes you to attract more things to complain about.” Here are his three steps, explained.
Remember the magical moments of your life.
Maybe this sounds vague to some. Or perhaps, in times of high stress, magical moments seem to evade the current mindset, but these times don’t have to be unprecedented fairy tales. They can be moments of major or minor successes, love, or pride. Miracle shares these examples: “Your wedding day, getting the promotion at work, or reaching a weight-loss goal are all magical moments. Whenever you feel doubt creep in, just know that you had magic in your past and you can have magic again in your present and future. Appreciate where you are now while also being hopeful for a better tomorrow.”
Be grateful and count your blessings.
For some, considering blessings is easily accessible, but for others, it’s not. That doesn’t mean we have none. “My first thought every day when I wake up is that I’m grateful I opened two gifts—my eyes. I recommend starting with three things you’re grateful for and really feel the feeling of gratitude for those things. For example, when you’re grateful for your health, imagine what life would be like if you didn’t have your health. That will cause the level of appreciation to increase, resulting in a higher form of gratitude.”
We can choose to be grateful for the daily mundane, because for so many, things we take for granted aren’t available. The humble reminder can have powerfully lifting effects.
Visualization is a mighty tool. Miracle’s biggest visualization trick? “Doing my morning car dance. I never start my day without doing a dance in my car. The reason why is because dancing and listening to your favorite song automatically increase your happiness and vibration. This is the best time to visualize—when you feel good. Visualization without feeling happy is a waste of time. When you combine visualizing while doing a happy dance, it causes your visions to manifest quicker.” Then, go to our happy places. Think of a dream home, a garden, an organized walk-in closet, and let it feel real. We actualize our blessings by believing in ourselves, and complaints feel like a distant memory.
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