Skip to main content
Close Close

Congratulations
You're on the list.

Make sure to check your spam folder so that our emails are always delivered into your inbox.
xo, Kourt
Give your inbox
and your life

the Poosh it needs.
By clicking SIGN UP, you agree to receive emails from Poosh and agree to our terms of use and privacy policy.
Free Shipping on All Domestic Orders.
  • HEALTH + WELLNESS
  • LIFE + STYLE
  • HOME + ENTERTAINING
  • KMK
Poosh
  • Poosh Your Wellness
  • instagram pinterest facebook twitter youtube join newsletter
  • Shop
  • search
  • search
  • body
  • diy
  • fitness
  • Giving Back
  • health
  • mind
  • Relationships
  • Sexual Wellness
  • soul
Do Allergies Get Worse as We Age?
Do Allergies Get Worse as We Age?
Why Kourtney Drinks Beet Juice Every Morning Before Her Workout 
Why Kourtney Drinks Beet Juice Every Morning Before Her Workout 
The Somatic Benefits of Shaking
The Somatic Benefits of Shaking
How to Make Your Salad Less Sad
How to Make Your Salad Less Sad
Your Essential Mineral Cheat Sheet
Your Essential Mineral Cheat Sheet
WTF Are Heart Rate Zones?
WTF Are Heart Rate Zones?
  • Adulting
  • beauty
  • guides
  • Hacks
  • style
  • travel
Self-Growth Hack: Small Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable
Self-Growth Hack: Small Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable
Summer Dresses You Can Wear Into Fall 
Summer Dresses You Can Wear Into Fall 
The Poosh 30-Day Mask Challenge 
The Poosh 30-Day Mask Challenge 
The Surprising Benefits of Buccal Facial Massage
The Surprising Benefits of Buccal Facial Massage
Under $50: How to Organize Your Pantry Like a Kardashian
Under $50: How to Organize Your Pantry Like a Kardashian
Chestne Hacks Everyone Should Know
Chestne Hacks Everyone Should Know
  • decor
  • entertaining
  • kids
  • motherhood
  • Playlists
  • recipes
How to Make Pineapple + Banana Vegan Whip
How to Make Pineapple + Banana Vegan Whip
Chocolate Chip Banana Bread Baked Oats
Chocolate Chip Banana Bread Baked Oats
The Easiest Cucumber Salad for Summer
The Easiest Cucumber Salad for Summer
2-Ingredient Oat Tortillas Recipe
2-Ingredient Oat Tortillas Recipe
Recreating Kylie’s Crispy Sandwich
Recreating Kylie’s Crispy Sandwich
How to Make Health Nut Original House Dressing at Home
How to Make Health Nut Original House Dressing at Home
  • family
  • kourtney
Why Kourtney Drinks Beet Juice Every Morning Before Her Workout 
Why Kourtney Drinks Beet Juice Every Morning Before Her Workout 
Kourt’s Matcha Protein Bites
Kourt’s Matcha Protein Bites
The Kravis Guide to Eating Vegan in LA
The Kravis Guide to Eating Vegan in LA
Kourt’s No-Makeup Glow Routine
Kourt’s No-Makeup Glow Routine
Penelope’s 10th Birthday Details
Penelope’s 10th Birthday Details
The Most Helpful Things Kourt Has Learned Since Having COVID Again
The Most Helpful Things Kourt Has Learned Since Having COVID Again
What are you looking for?

Menu

  • Shop
  • HEALTH + WELLNESS
    • body
    • diy
    • fitness
    • Giving Back
    • health
    • mind
    • Relationships
    • Sexual Wellness
    • soul
  • HOME + ENTERTAINING
    • decor
    • entertaining
    • kids
    • motherhood
    • Playlists
    • recipes
  • KMK
    • family
    • kourtney
  • LIFE + STYLE
    • Adulting
    • beauty
    • guides
    • Hacks
    • style
    • travel
  • Poosh Your Wellness
  • Newsletter
instagram pinterest facebook twitter youtube join newsletter
mind

How to Let Go of  CONTROL

By Monica Berg
share on pinterest share on facebook share on twitter Share on Flipboard share by email
 Photo credit @bellahadid
@bellahadid

How different would your day look if you let go of the impulse to control outcomes and other people’s behavior? What if you just let go and let it all be? Did your mind begin anxiously racing through all the things that could go wrong?

We all want agency over our lives, and to a great extent, we have it. However, things go awry when we try to exert control over things that are inherently beyond our control. We spend so much energy trying to change the unchangeable. But here’s a simple truth: you aren’t in control. You ARE in partnership with the Universe.

Ahead, I’m sharing five actionable ways to let go of control for a happier life.

Step 1: Focus on what you can control.
Things that you can control are your actions, reactions, and words. Things that you cannot control include the weather, traffic, other people’s behavior, and what people think of us.

Assuming it is something that you can control, ask yourself if you need to. Some things just aren’t really that important. If it is something that you can change, and it’s important to you, put your energy into it and do the best you can.

Step 2: Understand why you feel the need to control the uncontrollable.
When you think about a situation or person that you can’t control but feel compelled to try, identify the feeling underneath the desire to control. Does the situation cause fear? Do you think things won’t work out the way you want? Are you afraid you will lose someone’s love or respect? Analyze those thoughts and seek to understand what they’re telling you and where they are coming from. Treat your control issues like a dear friend. Listen, be gentle, and give them your full attention.

Step 3: Accept the outcome in advance.
To let go of controlling impulses, we have to be willing to accept the outcome, whatever it is. Likely it won’t be just as we’d pictured it, but by letting go, we allow room for an even better outcome to occur. I describe this step as surrendering to the process of life. For many, the word surrender suggests giving up and thereby giving something away. Quite the opposite, surrender is the simple act of yielding to the flow of life rather than opposing it. It means refocusing your energy on what is within your control and letting go of what is not. It’s about acting and reacting in ways that support your growth when life unfolds in unexpected ways.

Letting go allows us to transcend painful emotions like disappointment, anger, and sadness. Because at the core of surrender is the conviction that the Universe is merciful and ultimately working in our best interest (even when we don’t understand how).

Step 4: Have a mantra.
Mantras are powerful shorthand. Have one ready when you need to remind yourself of your decision to let go of the things you can’t control. Here are a few examples.

  • I know what to surrender and what not to.
  • I am not in control, and that’s OK. I never was.
  • Surrender is not weakness. There is great strength in letting go.
  • I have certainty in the process, even when the outcome is unknown.

Step 5: Revel in how much better you feel.
Letting go gives us more freedom than control ever could.

Monica Berg is an international speaker, spiritual thought leader, and Chief Communications Officer of the Kabbalah Centre. She is the author of Fear Is Not an Option and Rethink Love and the co-host of the Spiritually Hungry podcast. A self-proclaimed “Change Junkie,” Monica is a fresh voice that channels her many years of kabbalistic study along with personal life experiences. Monica shows individuals how to create a life that not only feels like it’s working but most importantly, a life in which they are living and loving as the powerful, fulfilled person they’ve always wanted to be.

The content provided in this article is provided for information purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice and consultation, including professional medical advice and consultation; it is provided with the understanding that Poosh, LLC (“Poosh”) is not engaged in the provision or rendering of medical advice or services. You understand and agree that Poosh shall not be liable for any claim, loss, or damage arising out of the use of, or reliance upon any content or information in the article.

Shop essentials for a 'me' night: 

Shop Stone Lymphatic Body Paddle
Shop Hormone Soothing Bath Soak
Shop Malibu Made Glow Oil
Shop Malibu Made Body Scrub

Up next, be the first to know our weekly content and sign up for our Poosh newsletter.

You may also like...

Go to article What Not to do if You Have Anxiety
mind

What Not to do if You Have Anxiety

Go to article How Knowing Your Dosha Type Can Help Perfect Your Self-Care Routine
body

How Knowing Your Dosha Type Can Help Perfect Your Self-Care Routine

Related Articles

Goes to article Don’t Forget Your Inner Child; Lessons in Self-Love and Support
mind

Don’t Forget Your Inner Child; Lessons in Self-Love and Support

Goes to article How to Make New Friends as an Adult
Relationships

How to Make New Friends as an Adult

Goes to article Are You Gaslighting Yourself?
mind

Are You Gaslighting Yourself?

Goes to article How to Stop Overthinking About Your Crush
mind

How to Stop Overthinking About Your Crush

Goes to article Can Swearing Actually Benefit Your Life and Relationships?
mind

Can Swearing Actually Benefit Your Life and Relationships?

Goes to article The Power of Play
mind

The Power of Play

Goes to article Yes, Crying Can be a Form of Self-Care
mind

Yes, Crying Can be a Form of Self-Care

Goes to article What’s Your Relationship With Anger?
mind

What’s Your Relationship With Anger?

  • About
  • Contact
  • Terms & Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Cookie Policy
  • California Privacy Rights
  • Affiliate Disclosure
  • Accessibility

Keep in Touch

instagram pinterest facebook twitter youtube join newsletter
Reviewed by Accessible360
  • © poosh, llc
    All Rights Reserved