Hello again, dear friend Anonymous. Welcome back to our sex talk column where readers submit questions, then we do our research and craft a story to answer as many questions as we can. The topic of our latest submission: how to dirty talk. We tapped two experts to weigh in. See what they had to say below, plus get some exact phrases to use.
Editor’s note: Although this article uses male pronouns, the advice applies to all sexual orientations and gender identities.
How can I feel less awkward talking dirty?
“Dirty talk can be fun and exciting and is often a big turn on!” says global leading sexologist Juliet Allen, founder of the Authentic Sex Podcast and Pleasure School. “Often though, we can feel confused and second-guess ourselves. Many people overthink dirty talk, so my advice is to let it flow naturally and avoid overthinking it.”
If you’re feeling nervous about saying things out loud, she recommends trying sexting first. “Describe what you’re looking forward to sexually or what you enjoyed about sex last time you connected. This is an easy way to ease into saying things out loud,” she says.
What kinds of things should I say?
“I asked over 500 men what they wanted to hear in bed, and the most common responses included feedback, compliments/affirmations, their name, moans and descriptive talk with a filthy twist,” says Stephanie Daily (aka The Liaison), a content creator who’s not afraid to ask the hard questions, the hot questions, and the embarrassing questions. “Like what you see? Say it. Enjoying what you feel? Say it. Loving the view? Describe it.”
Some submissions she received:
-“Spontaneously during, say what I did to make her wet/orgasm in a previous experience.”
-“Simple. Men want to hear they are desired and giving pleasure … but dirtier.”
-“Slowly saying my name with heavy breathing is a huge turn-on.”
-“Keywords: pussy, panties, c*ck, lick, f*ck. A little raunchiness is OK.”
-“We WANT you to talk dirty. If it turns out cheesy, laughing together is GOOD!”
OK, but now can you be super specific? Give me some lines, pls!
We gotchu. Here are some exact phrases you can copy, courtesy of Juliet.
-‘I love the way you taste in my mouth.’
-‘Your cock feels so good in my hand, I love feeling how hard you get.’
-‘I can’t wait to have you sit on my face tonight.’
-‘You look and feel so beautiful when you cum.’
-‘I want to fuck your sweet round ass all night.’
-‘I want you to cum so hard in my pussy tonight, baby.’
-‘You are the most beautiful woman. I love the way my cock feels inside you, my queen.’
-‘I love how you taste baby, I want your fullness inside my mouth.’
-‘I want to fuck you so hard tonight.’
-‘You sound so sexy when I’m going down on you.’
-‘I loved cuddling you after we made love last night, baby.’
-‘I feel so connected to you after making love. I can’t wait to do it again, my love.’
-‘You’re so beautiful, thank you for opening your pussy and your heart to me. I love you.’
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