Here’s a sad-but-true scenario:
By today’s standards, Berger dumping Carrie via Post-It note doesn’t seem all that bad. The infamous words, “I’m sorry. I can’t. Don’t hate me.” are practically poetry compared to being ghosted.
Ghosting—when someone abruptly ends communication with no explanation—is all too common. We’ve covered how to handle being ghosted, but we wanted to discuss some red flags that could signal you may be ghosted by the person you’re dating.
1. They have a pattern of canceling plans at the last minute. Ofc, things come up, and people have to reschedule. But when it happens frequently and they make no follow-up plans, it’s a red flag.
2. They’re commitment-phobic. When someone shows you who they are, believe them—especially if they have shown you that they fear commitment.
3. You don’t have any friends in common. Look, this obvs isn’t a red flag in and of itself—it’s good to get outside our social networks! But it has been shown that that indirect relationship dissolution strategies like ghosting are more likely if your social lives and environments are nothing alike.
4. They have an avoidant attachment style. Guess who else finds indirect relationship dissolution strategies appealing? People with avoidant attachment styles often choose ghosting to maintain their emotional distance.
5. They’re terrible at answering texts. Sure, people are busy and have lives. But if you used to get a text every day and now you’re waiting for days on end, it could be a sign they’re going to ghost you.
6. And when they do text, you’re carrying the conversation. Number five becomes a bigger red flag when their texts are noncommittal. Even when they do text, they don’t have much to say.
You ask, we answer. Send your relationship questions to [email protected], and one of our experts may just answer them in an upcoming column.