One of my most random, life-changing moments happened during 10 Things I Hate About You. (And no, it’s actually not the “Reginald’s quivering member” part.) Chastity asks the question, “I know you can be underwhelmed and you can be overwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?”
While it may seem ditzy on the surface, I say it’s actually a surprisingly existential question. Because when I think about it, have I ever just been whelmed?
I seem to always exist in one extreme or another. Too much, too little. Anxious, depressed. Overwhelmed, underwhelmed.
Over the years, I’ve put together an arsenal of tools to support my mental health while searching for the elusive whelmed state.
One tool I’ve been using when feeling really anxious is The Anti-Anxiety Notebook by Therapy Notebooks.
It’s kind of like having a pocket therapist. Ofc, it’s not a substitute for an actual therapist, but it was written by therapists and is based on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).
My good old friend, the GAD-7 scale, even makes an appearance. This scale is used by therapists to help measure anxiety. It presents a series of statements and asks you how frequently you’ve felt them in the past two weeks. Like “not being able to stop or control worrying” or “desiring to flee to the countryside of Spain and become a sheep farmer.” (Jk, obvs that last one isn’t actually on there. But if I had to answer, it would be “almost daily.”)
This journal is designed to help you process your emotions and experiences in a constructive way. I especially like that it’s structured—but not too structured, if you know what I mean. It gives you enough info to understand what’s going on without being overwhelming.
The journal is broken down into chapters. At the beginning of each, there are a couple pages explaining the topic and some check-in questions, followed by guided journal entries interspersed with quick little notes from a therapist.
These journal entries are all the same, no matter what chapter you’re in, so you don’t have to go in order. Or even really read the chapter. You can just go straight to journaling if you want!
The format of the journal entries follows a common CBT exercise. The first prompt asks you to describe the situation that’s making you anxious, the thoughts going through your mind, and the emotions you’re feeling (and the intensity of those emotions). Then, it asks you to identify any thought patterns before the final challenge of writing down how you can think about the situation differently.
“Sometimes we take for granted that what’s in our head is fact. The more you put your thoughts into writing, the more you can challenge them,” reads one of the therapist notes.
If your thoughts are in writing, you can go back and read them. Once you get past the cringe factor, it’s easier to recognize repeated thought patterns. If nothing else, just being aware of them has made a huge difference for me.
For instance, my common thought patterns are catastrophizing, all or nothing thinking, and magnifying the negative. Can I get a “hell, yeah” from all my other anxious, hyperbolic Pooshies?!
I’ve found that having this journal on hand can help me break out of the feedback loop of my thoughts when I’m ruminating. Going through the prompts in the journal entry feels way less intimidating than writing on a blank page.
And the notebook deserves an aesthetic mention as well. Inside, the pages have a dotted grid instead of the harsh lines of traditional journals. Overall, the colors, feel, and design are very soothing and evoke a sense of calm.
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