Storytime, Pooshies. Hi, it’s Michelle again! Disclaimer: this story is not about me, I’m simply narrating through my friend’s POV. Since she’d like to remain anonymous, let’s call her Holly.
So Holly was in town a couple of weeks ago, and we were catching up on life (dating, work, family—all the updates). When we got to our dating convo, she was like, “Well, last winter I sorta dated a girl.”
Holly expands, “I’ve been dating men for years, and it’s not working out so far. My roommates (who are gay) told me their friend was interested in me so I figured why not give it a shot. We went on a couple of dates and right off the bat I could tell she enjoyed knowing I hadn’t been with a girl before and that she had a lot to teach me. I didn’t mind that, because I truly went into the short-lasting relationship open-minded and was down for whatever.”
I love knowing every single detail so, of course, I asked all the questions. “Did you feel a connection?” “Who made the first move?” “Have you gone on dates with other women?” “Did you sleep with her?”
Holly didn’t hold back. She told me she enjoyed the dates and felt enough of a spark to hook up with her. They had made out a couple of times after previous dates, but this last time they had plans to have a sleepover. Holly said she immediately went to her roommates (since they have the experience) and asked them, “OK, what do I need to know … how do I go down on a girl? I feel like it’s going to happen tonight.” The advice they gave her was just to remember “circle, circle, up, up, and go from there.” Holly took it pretty literally and told me and my other friends who were at dinner that night that she lasted five seconds and her partner kindly guided her back up. Being the TMI group of friends that we are, we told her, “Well, they forgot to tell you the last part … circle, circle, up, up, slide a finger up the butt.” We were kind of kidding. Jokes aside, we know the last part isn’t for everybody, so feel it out first (no pun intended) with your partner’s preference of course.
So you’re reading this and thinking OK, where is this going? A few points: 1) Holly is confident enough to explore her sexuality and share her experience with her friends. 2) Through this experience, she learned more about her body and sexual needs, including what she likes in bed. She shamelessly admitted she enjoyed receiving more than giving (“I wasn’t great at it, OK?!”) and that scissoring is actually a lot different than what she had pictured in her mind. The more you know, right? 3) It’s just sex, no matter who you’re in bed with, and it can simply be about pleasing each other and trying new things. *If that’s what you want it to be.
In fact, I was just at lunch last weekend and overheard a Gen Z table talking about how they think in 10 years it won’t be taboo when you hear about somebody who is straight but has slept with the same sex. It shouldn’t be a weird thing to talk about or want to try (if it interests you).
Hearing Holly’s story made me want to share it with our readers (with her permission, obvi) and remind everybody to not take everything so seriously. If you want to see what it’s like to hook up with the same sex, do it. You don’t have to wake up the next morning and automatically identify differently. Of course, if you do wake up and want to explore further, DO IT. It’s about normalizing the conversation and not making it a “thing.”
For Holly, she’s still keeping things fluid, and as we were at dinner she even got another woman’s number and has been flirting over text with her. And the rest is still unwritten …
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